I was sitting across from my old friend (the one I detest) at a table in a mall. We were chatting, perhaps catching up. Then she started to mention a guy that we used to know (the name was no one I knew, but I suppose he represented someone else) that was tied to my 'craziness'. I just stared at her as I didn't know what else to do. I've put that behind me and I couldn't believe that she was bringing it back up and trying to drag me back into that life. She was going on about this guy and I just kept thinking, "You know that none of that was real, so why are you still attached to it?" but I'm not sure if I said anything. Then, without warning, she either disappeared or became invisible. I called out her name but nothing happened. At this point I may have gained some consciousness as I started to think to myself. I realised that I'd never be able to count on anyone and that people would always disappear. Then somehow I felt your embrace and thought of you. Almost felt like you were a ~presence~. I think I told myself/realised that you would be there, which seems like quite a statement to make. Meaningful dream, for sure.

dream

I was walking back to work from lunch and all of a sudden people starting running inside, so I ran after them. Then when I got back in everyone was standing up and attentively looking at the TV waiting for something, I just got on my pc and started looking up stuff and everyone got mad, like 'wtf' and I just said that I don't care about whatever happened, because it never affects me. Then the TV said something about some nuclear explosion in nevada which is going to send shocks everywhere. Ten seconds later the building shook and the lights went out and I crashed down thinking I died, felt dying/falling asleep. Then I woke up and was okay and just laid there listening to the building getting slammed by wind, it was serious. Building I was in only was holding up because it was designed better (for security, though it isn't really). So I thought I would end up dying and then my though was OMG I GOTTA TEXT LAURA, and I got out my phone and texted I LOVE YOU and then my dream ended. I think that was the best part of the dream. Woke up and loved that, cause it felt 100% real. Also, I didn't think about cell phone not working in that situation + I had feeling that it was only florida getting the earthquake etc, but really it would have been all of USA. Anyway, nightmare turned into an awesome dream cause you were in it.

dream

I had a scary dream! I was some kind of a song writer or something, and I was sitting there and traveling back in time, and some woman there kept seeing me travel back in time so she started believing in time travel. Then I was getting convinced to kill myself through some voices, and I could tell she was doing it to so that we could 'be together finally'. I wasn't me either, so it's not a cheat-dream. In the dream pulling all my teeth out was same as killing myself. So I killed myself and then I began to look for my previous songs that would make me think it's a good idea that I killed myself. Cause it sucked to have no teeth. Crazy dream.

The one after it was better, I was in a hotel with you and there was another couple there and we were doing like a groupthing, but pretty quickly me & you got off the bed to our own thing and did it. Twice too and it very graphical + realistic. Felt good. Almost sure I had a rxn when it was happening.

Dream

Had another insecurity dream. Wasn't even a dream but like a ~feeling~. Was for some reason feeling like you had some undefined relationship w/ some guy that you were not telling me about, just alluding 2 it. Like you were living with someone or went over some guy's house every once in a while but wouldn't really talk about it. I was waking up and panicking and stuff. Then I woke up and knew that you were definitely 100% with me and then I saw your facebook message and thought it was the best timing. Sux that my dreams are insecure.

dream

I was dreaming that I was talking to you and kept asking about this guy who you went to see every day. I was getting super hurt & jealous that you guys were 'doing it'. I think the feelings weren't just in the dream, but real feelings, I don't know. I kept asking about it and you were vague. Then you were in your bathtub and I was looking at stuff and you said that you'll come out of the bath in a second and come over through the screen or something, I got excited that we could do that and wondered why we didn't do it before, then when you got out and were still wet & naked I jumped through the screen and went to hug you, you were mad. The dream ended eventually and became about some auction of soviet heavy machinery, burons & huge army trucks and stuff.

i can't place anything in order, but here's what i remember.
we were going from hotel to hotel. there was some dream unrelated to you from before that had to do with my manager letting me go into his house, and also one about being downtown in some city. so, we were @ some hotel and we left. we wanted privacy, because i guess some people could see us? i made sure to take all of my stuff out of the dressers and we found a new room. then i went back for some reason later and found a ton of my clothing that i'd left behind :(
when we went to the new room, you said it might not be the best idea because my manager was staying near it, but i didn't see the problem.
i've since lost the transition to this, but the next thing i can recall is that we were doing ~intimate~ things. you were on top of me and we were kissing. you didn't have anything on, i had some clothing on, but i guess it disappeared, because then we were "practicing" what it would be like. we didn't technically do anything but i was worried that i would get pregnant*. you had me touch you and i think you touched my chest. for some reason my dream was very vivid in that i could really make out 'details'. every time i touched you, you said i had to go higher and then you'd laugh b/c i did it wrong. the third time, you laughed and fell off me. i was upset because i didn't know how to go any higher!!

*when i woke up i was relieved that it wasn't real b/c i was seriously scared about getting pregnant. why didn't i say anything when it was happening, though :/

so many dreams about you, but i recall little.
i remember being in my room and us doing intimate things. you had on white underwear. i remember trying to see if i could spot anything. either my dad came home and was in his room, or we discovered that he'd been there the entire time. i'm not sure what happened after that. but i know i wanted to continue what i'd been doing before but obviously had some misgivings.
another was that you had come out to visit. i believe this dream happened before the others so i remember only that. i think there was something about me working at b&bw. i think i didn't want you to leave. we ran out of time?
another dream was that some guy was following me as i tried to go into this apt. complex/dorm i lived in. it turned into a dept. store. i ended up looking at wedding dresses so he wouldn't find me. i was glad you'd never know i was looking at them. as i was doing this, a fat, black girl in a wheelchair came over with an attendant/nurse. she started yelling @ both of us to hand over one of the dresses (oddly enough, none of them were white) and i just ignored her. she became irate and one of us escalated it. by the way, it was obvious somehow that she was in her condition because of some virus, or some cause that wasn't her fault. so it was ~scandalous~ (and funny) when i yelled @ her that she became that way b/c she was born on a fat farm. then i apologised and explained to her that she needed to learn the value of please & thank you. she wheeled away after that.
last dream, which may have come after, was being in the car with some male, my mother, and a girl i went to high school with. she was herself but i think she also represented laura. she was asking me about you (which made it awkward). she asked something about how we were doing or whatever and who knows what i said. all i remember her asking was, "so, how do you feel about him liking you that much?: as if everyone knew, as if it was a huge, unbelievable amount of affection you held for me. i answered with, "it's insane".

Dream

I had a lot of dreams with you but the one I remember is we were driving around a river and got to a good spot. I went down the dock to try to jump in and you stayed on top, there was a grandfather with his grandson there and they were like WHOA and I looked and it was some whale like thing. My first thought was 'I hope it's not a manatee' then I ran up to you to tell you about it and you took some pix of me and then I woke up!

Dream

Had a dream where me and you were driving at night somewhere far away. I crossed a couple of railroad tracks and at each one people crashed. I would call 911. Finally we got somewhere and the dream changed to me and a friend being somewhere in the woods and I'm letting him drive my jeep and saying he couldn't make it up some hill. He couldn't and flipped over. Then we drove to the insurance place to get it fixed but it was raining and I drove a different car and was driving super dangerously and couldn't keep control. The adjuster said $380 to fix it, the shop said $4700 or something. Then the dream ended.

Dream

I had a dream where me and you were in a gas station and I kept looking for something to eat and you were helping me.. It was like 30 minutes and I never managed to pick anything out!!!

dreamed that you and i were in my old house with my mom. we were all talking and then all of a sudden i whipped around and wanted to tell her that we were dating but i couldn't/didn't. i kept trying but i wanted to tell you before i did. at some point i was holding your hand and other people were around and i was trying to hint to her, but she did her usual "IDGI WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO KNOW BY SHOWING ME YOUR HANDS" and i got mad and joked that she'd be a terrible spy because she never gets anything.
and then later i was in some rock group that had to perform, but Optimus Male ruined our routine. he was some huge villain. it sucked.

had a dream where i dated other people

Dream

Had a detailed dream about me going to the store to buy a bike tire. I was looking at the tires, spinning them around, spinning the gears etc. Kind of an asperger dream. Another one I was in space on a spaceship and I wanted to cuddle/fall asleep and you were there and that's what we did, and I fell asleep inside my dream! So lazy!

Dream

I had a lot of dreams but I don't remember most of them, except one where I traveled home through the sewer system and came out of the toilet. Sounds gross now but it wasn't gross in the dream, just was the normal way of  traveling. I looked out the window and saw a bunch of deer and among them was a yellow dog who thought it was a deer and was running with them!!!!

Dream

I had a dream that I was meeting you. It was at night and I was going up the elevator in an old building. It was a soviet stalin-era building (kind of building I used to live in in st. petersburg), that's weird. It was dark. You came out and you had on heeled shoes that made you way taller than me. Dream ended shortly after that. That's like the third time where you are taller than me in a dream!!! Definitely some insecurity showing through..

apparently dreamed about some secret garden. that's the phrase i told myself to remember, anyway.
something about discovering a garden or secret compartment in a house.
there's more but it's been a long day. i hate that i'm forgetting it, because i know i'll remember it later, and because i feel like it was a good/interesting dream. somehow significant. oh well.

him im'ing me as soon as i woke up-fel t real
22 hours paycheck @ work, ladders

I guess in the dream you messaged me on AIM right as I woke up and I was a little irritated. I thought it was real!
Another dream was at my job. I recall being on/seeing ladders. I believe my co-workers and I were talking about a 22 hour workweek. That's because I asked my co-manager about my swiftly decreasing hours last night.

Dream
I slept on a couch and heard someone breaking in. I tried to pretend I wasn't there, and I suppose part of me wasn't. I was in my old childhood home and I think the robbers took children. I decided to sleep downstairs in the basement, which was based on a different home I used to live in. I don't remember much other than I had black parents that argued and that I was thinking about the extra room in the basement. I was on the couch in the living room down there, looking at the room. I was thinking about how I'd only be in there sometimes. Then I was thinking of you and things we could do in there. I'm not sure why and don't remember much else.

Dreams on Jun 20 2011

I had a really good dream in the middle of the night which I woke up and made a mental note to remember. I forgot it.


I remember one dream vividly though. I went to some rental place to pick up a trailer that I left there years ago. I stole that trailer too and it was full of junk.  The girl at the counter was flirting with me and caused a huge pile up in the line. All my information was lost since it's been so long. She handed me a pen to sign for something and then started showing me something 'will you join us on facebook?' and I ignored it + grabbed the pen. She pulled the pen back and was like HEY I'M TRYING TO TALK TO U! So I had to listen to her about facebook. Then they had to do a whole lot of running around to release the trailer to me, because the titles didn't match up etc - they told me if it turns out the trailer doesn't belong to me, they'll come after me. I also didn't have to pay any $$$ they were just happy to get it out of there. I was pulling out and thinking of ways to get the title to it, then the dream ended.

Dreams on Jun 19 2011

I had one dream where we were together, in a classroom together, talking about something. We had a presentation due the next day. It was a long dream but I don't remember what happened in the classroom. We went home and went to sleep and when I woke up my gums were super gross/inflamed sticking out of my mouth - so I couldn't go to class and do a presentation..

Another one with you is that we were married and looking at a class/marriage picture and we were standing there and off to the side was us standing again, only in the future and I was old!I!II! I was like wtf, how did this happen, did we travel in time, and do I really look that gross and old in the future? I had puffs of hair + glasses and stuff. Then we decided that it wasn't us but a couple that looked like us.

Also, I had a dream where someone kept asking me questions about social media and technology - and they were difficult questions, I had a hard time answering them, and I was answering them all good. Went on for a while too, kind of funny.

These were my notes:
blind girl carriage
murder
brandi/mom/assignment/theatre/cried


Don't remember what the 1st one was about. I'm sure I will later but it wasn't important.
I remember watching a show about murder, like Nancy Grace, which I used to watch with my mom.
I remember being in a theater class and having some issues, I think people didn't want to work with me? Teacher was apparently my mother. I cried and it seems funny now, but it was horrible in the dream. I recall my old friend Brandi being in there.

Don't remember my dream, but I know that it featured a certain someone, because I told myself multiple times to remember to tell you! Posting so I can use my tag.

Dreams on Jun 17 2011

4wheelparts:
The only dream I remember is coming to 4wheelparts and getting the owner to do my tire for me. He was saying stuff that I couldn't hear, then I pulled my jeep into the shop and some employee said "he spent so much time cleaning this garage, he's going to freak out to see a jeep in it" and I said "he just told me to come in here!". Then we messed with my tire and the owner said that he was tired because he was at some play in north carolina yesterday, and he was happy with the play because there was no racial tension there and no one was offended. I told him that if you live in the south, you learn not to get offended. He disagreed.

Dreams on Jun 16 2011

Bus dream

I was standing in the parking lot looking at a school bus and complaining about the axles in it being weak. Then an older style bus came by and I said "those are better". Then I realized that I didn't know anything about bus axles and the dream ended.

Criminal dream

I was some criminal and I went to check out a safe-house I owned. It was in disrepair. Went to the shed and there were some cool tools there, notably a crazy axe and some antique pulley/chain things. The house was on water, I think a beach/bayou. Saw the guy I put in charge of it and eventually he started attacking me! Also, there was somebody with me but they didn't do anything, and I didn't know who they were. I kept shooting the guy with a flamethrower but he kept going after me. Finally I subdued him & forgave him and left and noted to send more money to him to take care of the house & told him to clean it up.